clap on! clap off!

so yesterday evening, my italian friend timothy stopped by for a brief visit. he commented on my living room television set, a 19" zenith system-3 unit complete with faux woodgrain and a little knob you pull to turn it on, and twist to adjust the volume. this means only one thing: it has no remote control.

never did, either.

i googled a bit and found this picture of an old zenith system 3 almost just like mine...except mine doesn't have the woodgrain in the front or the fabric speaker cover. instead it's this snazzy brushed aluminum (fake, presumably), over the front trim and speaker cover, with the woodgrain on the sides. it wouldn't look out of place in urban outfitters, a diesel store, or some swanky los angeles cocktail lounge, even if it doesn't have that trick flip-down keypad. it does have a keypad and no dials, but still...it was a mid-range model. it has a great picture though...better than most new television sets on the market right now.

back in 1984 when it was built, people were still able to actually get up to adjust volume and change channels, an absurd concept to people under the age of 20, apparently. however, in this age of comfort and convenience, one can circumvent this obstacle with one of the most amazing inventions of the 20th century.

the clapper.

now, after demonstrating my clapper to timothy, he was astounded. then he laughed uncontrollably...saying he had never heard of or seen such an invention. you see, timothy is from rome and milan...and apparently either you have a remote control or get the fuck off your mio sedero and change the channel yourself.

then he asked me, "what is so hard about getting up to change the channel on the tv?"

"because it's easier just to sit here and clap."

hey...god bless america.