Another Madge album.

So, I got an email from a fellow blogger yesterday, with the new single from Madonna, "Hung Up" attached to it. I downloaded it, then started listening. Now, I've never been a huge Madonna fan, even when I was in high school. I liked the songs "La Isla Bonita" and "Open Your Heart" but I could not understand people who absolutely puddled themselves over her. I will admit, however, the "Express Yourself" video I'd see on MTV when they used to play music was absolutely HOT. I tried to grow my hair out like the guy in the video, but it just didn't work out like that. Anyway, if she was on 92Q (the Cleveland Heights-based teenybopper station of the 80's, WRQC), I'd listen to it, but I rarely, if ever, taped any of her songs off the air.

So I listened to the song from the dirty, filthy blogger. And trust me, this kid is FILTHY. I heard the Abba "Gimme Gimme Gimme" sample almost immediately.

Wow! Nobody has EVER sampled Abba before! [eye roll]

The song is okay, but it's nothing groundbreaking. Don't get me wrong, I didn't dislike the song, it's fun with frisky use of color (xoxo, Ed), it's catchy, and not overtly offensive, but it just didn't wow me.

It had about the nutritional qualities of a piece of Bubble Yum bubble gum...and the intense flavor lasted about as long. Let's just say I won't be listening to it over and over again, and am bracing myself for the inevitable heavy play it's going to get in bars and the on the radio.

Now let's talk about that album cover.

"Confessions on a Dance Floor" huh? That's SO cutting edge! Wow! AND she sampled Abba!

Is it just me, or does she look like she fell down in that picture, fractured her hip, and she's trying to hold herself up? I mean, I confess a lot of things on the dance floor, and I have been known to get a bit scandalous when shaking my ass at Badlands (a guilty pleasure I indulge a few times a year) but I never do that. Pick yourself up, gurl! Dust yourself off and get another cocktail! You don't have to "confess" anything to be because I can't hear a goddamn thing you just said! Just smile, nod, feel hella-good, and just keep on dancing.

Now, before any hardcore Madge fans start pummeling me with hate email, I will say this. Madonna was, and remains, one of the most savvy businesswomen in the industry, and is the master of media manipulation. She has built a powerful media empire, and her children will be hiers to one of the biggest Hollywood media fortunes in history.

I say, good for her. I adore her for those accomplishments. Good for marketing her product to the masses.

Oh, and her "Ray of Light" album was tolerable.

But as an artist?

Well...bless her heart.

And that's about enough out of me.