goodbye, old friend

Today, I bid a bittersweet adieu to my trusty old Motorola i90. It was time, really...that i90 has been with me through 3 apartments, 3 countries, 3 ocean cruises, 2 intense relationships, 2 car accidents, a trans-Canada train ride on VIA from Vancouver to Toronto in Silver and Blue Class (the trip of a lifetime), swiped off a bar in Montreal (but I found it in a bathroom), has been used to call for cabs in San Francisco, Los Angeles, Portland, Seattle, Vancouver, Halifax, Banff, Jasper, Great Falls, Helena, Whitefish, Missoula, Montreal, Toronto, Cleveland, Detroit, and of course, New York. Also, it was run over by a SnoCoach out on the Athabasca Glacier, dropped in the sand on Waikiki Beach, dropped on CalTrain, MUNI, and BART tracks, accidentally stomped upon by a drunk Bulgarian at the Issac Walton Inn in Essex, Montana, and mysteriously rang in a dead zone while I was hanging out in the woods, smoking BC weed, with a bunch of insane Canadian snowboarders while basking in the 10 PM summer solstice sun in northern Alberta.

You can say this phone has been around; muhfukka has some serious-ass mileage on it. It's developed some charging problems lately, shuts itself off for no reason, drops calls left and right, and the battery is slowly dying.

It was time for a change. Out with the old, in with the new.

Incidentally, my friend Jack says the shadow in the picture above looks like a penis. Oh Jack. You're gay as a goose!

Unfortunately, stupid fucking Nextel wants a 2-year agreement if I want to buy a new phone with them, and if I don't, they will charge me "retail" which means I'd be paying close to $450 for the phone I want. Well, I hate Nextel, and I can't wait until my contract is up, so the hell with that shit. I consulted the one place you can find almost anything you want...craigslist.

I found a sexy Motorola i730 for sale for $150 down in Pacifica, about a 20-minute drive from San Francisco. Since I am currently sans-automobile, I asked Chris A. if he wanted to hop in the Jag for a cruise down the coast a bit.

He was up for it.

So down we cruised...and I got the phone for the same price I would have paid Nextel for renewing my contract for 2 years. It was brand-new, and we totally looked like pimps pulling up in that Jag in the modest Pacifica neighborhood. The guy selling it (pretty damn cute, but straight) came out of his house, eyed us, and accepted my $150 cash. He then handed me the phone, still boxed in its original package. It was so shady, but...I can be pretty shady at times.

So, I took it home, and started customizing it. There aren't too many bling features on it, but I really don't care...I use it for communicating, not accessorizing. I chose a blue font color scheme, and put a picture of a Doberman Pinscher on it.

There. Done.

When you have a polyphonic ringtone selected, this nifty disco light blinks and flashes around on it. It's kinda cute, and also about as ghetto-bling as I want to get with my cellphone.

(note to self: moisturize your cuticles better)

Does my old landline look like it's scowling at my new phone? No matter...I might be getting a free landline for shits and giggles through my broadband connection, so I can use my rotary phone collection again.

Anyway, as far as the old i90 goes...it was a piece of shit, I never really liked it, and as far as I'm concerned, good fucking riddance:

(note to self: dust your damn garbage can before you take a picture of it...dummy)

The point of this post: None. I'm just excited about my new phone, because it's a hell of a lot nicer than my old one. Sounds better, too.

And of course, you can't beat that disco light...it's proably one of the sassiest phones Nextel has to offer...except of course, the i830, but I don't want to spend that kind of money quite yet...



At 20:25, Blogger rich said...

Jack is right... it looks like a big fat penis.

At 01:15, Blogger brando said...

glad to see that you are blogging again, love it!

At 09:18, Blogger Kiks said...

*Nice!*... this way we can also find out where you've been in your 34 years... smart move, I'm impressed. =D

At 09:28, Blogger Kelleah said...

Dude, you've been to Banff?! Color me impressed. Good move on the whole phone exchange. I hope I have the same luck when I try to get my hands on an LG come July.

(Actually, I think I just like saying Banff. It sounds dirty.)

At 10:24, Blogger Jon said...

I know how you feel. While I want and have a modern enough phone, I just use it to talk, and very rarely, text message (but only if I get one- I never send any other than to reply to one).

At 17:36, Blogger Alexa said...

It sort of looks like a penis, with a long ass needle sticking into it :-P

At 18:05, Blogger D.T. said...

You know...they only put long ass needles in penises, when testing for STD's. Yeah. My friend had to do that one time, and the scream I heard in the other room...not a pretty sound.

Speaking of sounds, have you downloaded any new ring tones? Cuz you know, a phone aint nothing unless it's got a cool sound. Know what I'm saying?

At 18:14, Blogger Chox said...

Kiks: I didn't even think of that...maybe I should blog about where I've been...all sorts of crazy stories...especially Vancouver, Montreal, and Toronto. Canadians are DIRTY. Especially the Quebecois porter on the VIA train.

Kelleah: Someone told me "Banff" is the sound someone makes when they ski into a tree.


I like saying "banff" as well, for the same reason you do.

"I totally banffed him in the ass."

"Will someone please banff me?"


Alexa: You just HAD to make me cringe, didn't you? ;-)

D.T.: No new ringtones yet, but another reason to stick a needle in your cock is that liquid viagra. I saw someone do that at a party once (don't ask) and I almost had to call a therapist afterward.

It. Was. Just. That. Wrong.

I was like, "Dude, if you'd quit tweaking so much, you wouldn't need to do that. Nobody likes accordion-dick."


Post a Comment

<< Home

© 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008 by Chad Fox. All rights reserved.